Wednesday, January 29, 2020

La Belle Dame sans Merci By John Keats Essay Example for Free

La Belle Dame sans Merci By John Keats Essay La Belle Dame sans Merci is a poem written by John Keats who was a romantic poet. The first three stanzas of this poem are spoken by the narrator who is talking to the poet, asking him why hes wondering by himself and looks so sad. He addresses the poet as wretched Wight roaming outside, all alone. The narrator whos out in the countryside talks about the night and the surroundings what its like presently. There are no sedges or birds in the trees. Everything seems to be complete as the harvests are done which marks the end of the year and the fact that there are no leaves tells us it is autumn too which is a time of the year when it seems as though all forms of life have come to an end. Out of curiosity he asks the poet what is wrong with him. The rest of the poem is the poets reply. The poet tells us that he saw an extremely beautiful lady somewhere as in the line I met a lady in the meads, full beautiful, a fairys child. The poet further describes the lady. He says that she was so beautiful and graceful that she couldnt have been a human. With such long hair and the grace as she had, she had to be a fairys child though her eyes seemed to be wild or disturbed. The poet makes her sit on his horse and in her presence, sees nothing else as in the line I set her on my pacing steed and nothing else saw all day long. She sings a song of such music and melody thats its definitely not human. A place where there seemed to be no sound of birds is now enchanted by music. The music is not ordinary music or song but that of a fairies and the immortal as in the line for sideways would she lean and sing a fairys song. The fairy in this poem represents the poetic inspiration which inspires poets and artists to write and compose. Without this they feel that they are good as dead. The poetic inspiration casts poets into a delightful mood out of which they are able to compose their poetry. It changes a poets life when it enters it by brightening it up and leaves it in a nasty way. Just the way poetic inspiration can change the life of a poet when it enters the previous picture of dull and lifelessness also brightens up when the lady is mentioned. In the third to fifth stanza the poet describes the experience in the presence of the lady and the poetic inspiration which are alike. The poet under the spell composes poetry with words as though decorating the fairy that seems to enjoy him poetry [decoration] very much and urges him to continue. He seems to be enjoying all the sensual pleasures which are of taste, sight, music, fragrance and touch. In the lines she found me roots of relish sweet and honey wild and manna dew, the words relish sweet, honey wild, and manna dew, symbolize or express rather, the pleasures experienced by the poet while writing poetry. In the next stanza we find key words which tell us something about the lady. In the lines and there she gazed and sighed deep and there I shut her wild sad eyes so kissed to sleep, the words sighed deep and wild sad eyes tell us that the lady is not happy about something and that she too is troubled over something. The lady who happens to be a fairy, one that belongs to the world of the immortal cannot stay with a person for long. This is because she is from a different world and so after a period of time she must desert the person no matter what and this is what has caused her grief. Even the best of men this world can offer, kings and warriors are no math and she must leave them all. In the same way, the poetic inspiration cannot stay with one person for a long time. It must move on and go to other people and inspire them to compose as well. In the next stanza we see how the poet tries to enjoy his few moments of ecstasy at the most and dream even if its on the cold hill side. The poet knows that he too, like those before him will be deserted. In the next stanza he describes his dream, or rather nightmare in which he sees the people who have already been deserted by the lady and become severely ill their life to them was as good as death. Without the fairy that they loved, they had nothing to live for. In the same sense the poetic inspiration allows poets to do what they love to do i.e. write poetry but once that is taken away, so is their ability of composing and they loose interest in life. The men are left with starved lips and pale faces with nothing worth living for. And when the poet wakes up, he find himself in the same situation and all alone on the cold hill side. And so the poet tells the narrator that he had been deserted by the one he loved most and it didnt really matter what time of the year it was because his life was as good as death.

Tuesday, January 21, 2020

Attention Deficit Hyperactive Disorder (ADHD) Essay -- ADHD ADD Parent

Parenting is something that no-one person is an expert and that no expert can tell you how to do it. If a person’s child is an absolute angel, does nothing wrong, and gets straight A’s; parenting still is difficult. When a child has a disorder such as ADHD (Attention deficit hyperactive disorder), the child needs much more from the parent than most parents bargain for. Parenting roles for a child with ADHD change greatly; from the time that a parent needs to spend helping the child tie their shoe, or taking the child out for a run in the park. ADHD is not a very easy concept to define, that being because there is no medical proof that the disorder exists. There is no test or questionnaire a child can take to prove that he/she is suffering from this disorder. â€Å"There are no objective diagnostic criteria for ADHD – no physical symptoms, no neurobiological signs, and no blood test. Despite claims to the contrary, there are no brain scans findings and no biochem ical imbalances. No physical test can be done to verify that a child has ADHD†(Breggin 144). A child taking drugs that suffers from ADHD has many side affects that come along with it. Side affects that a parents needs to be aware of, and educated about so they can be taken care of the right way. Over the past 10-20 years, the use of Ritalin in this country has jumped to extreme levels. It is odd to think that maybe it is not advancements in testing for this disorder, or a question of being able to solve a problem that cannot be solved. It is that parents don’t have the time or the effort to spend with their children. The age is approaching when women will be as independent financially as men are. It has forever been accustomed for women to stay at home and care for the children of a family. Now there are women who want to establish their careers, but it is impossible for them to do that with a child to take care of. A parent with an ADHD child must altar their normal wa y of parenting, even if the parent had previous kids that were normal.   Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  A question that is frequently asked and is yet, almost impossible to answer is, â€Å"what is ADHD?† â€Å"Attention-deficit Hyperactivity Disorder is a neuropsychological impairment experienced by some 2 million children-3 to 5% of the school-age population.†(Seagal 263) The symptoms that exist with ADHD vary from day to day and from situation to situation. Some symptoms a... ...lem quickly. Thinking about what the fast food is doing for your health, much as thinking about what Ritalin is doing for your child, it is rarely thought about. Yet, eating fast food quick fixes your hunger, just like Ritalin quick fixes your child’s problems at school.   Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  ADHD is a very difficult and confusing disorder to deal with when it comes to your children. It is hard to establish is looking out a window or active behavior is just natural for your child, or if your child has a problem. Many drugs can help a child settle down and concentrate better. These drugs should be used for a temporary purpose only; where the goal is to be able to function properly without taking them. Parents and children all have a difficult time dealing with ADHD. It takes time and a lot of hard work between the child and the parents. â€Å"While parenting is the hardest job of them all, there’s no hope for our children unless parents retake responsibility from the â€Å"experts† and determine for themselves to take the most sensible, effective, and loving approach to their children. We may seek professional guidance but we must never relinquish parental intuition, common sense, or love.†(Breggin 288)

Monday, January 13, 2020

Pre Marital Counselling Essay

Premarital Counselling is therapy with two people prior to their marriage, to help give them more realistic ideas of what to expect and how to cope with living with another person as a spouse; relating to each other as a committed pair. By taking the time to explore the reasons you came together, your similarities, your differences, your hopes and your dreams, as well as your expectations of one another, it is sometimes possible to avoid the disappointments that many couples face with the passage of time. Pre-marital counseling offers the opportunity to explore your differences in a relatively safe, supportive, constructive environment. And while some couples may choose to postpone their union until key differences can be resolved, most couples find that pre-marital counseling helps to prepare them for the kind of life they would like to build together. Premarital counseling can help ensure that you and your partner have a strong, healthy relationship — giving you a better chance for a stable and satisfying marriage. Premarital counseling can also help you identify weaknesses that could become bigger problems during marriage. Through premarital counseling, couples are encouraged to discuss a wide range of important and intimate topics related to marriage, such as: Finances, Communication Beliefs and values Roles in marriage Affection and sex Children & parenting Family relationships Decision making Dealing with anger Time spent together. The initial period of any relationship is called the honeymoon period; and after that fairytale, marriage can be a rude reality check. In most cases, quarrels over money, family and trust break a couple apart. A pre-marital session helps partners accept each other better and avoid future complications or conflict. † Contrary to popular belief, pre marital counseling isn’t only for couples who are going in for an arranged marriage. It is also very important for couples who have had long courtships or have been living together. In arranged marriages, the people going to spend their life together are perpetual strangers, with no idea of what lies ahead of them. In India specifically, arranged marriages are sealed with just one word of advice for the bride â€Å"you HAVE to adjust, and you HAVE to compromise. Premarital Counselling ensures that the couple do not just â€Å"fulfill† the responsibilities of marriage for their family, but also participate in it wholly as individuals. In india marriages are seen as a ‘union of two families’ and the individuals who are supposed to spend the rest of their life together, they get lost in the entire plan. Pre Marital Counselling ensures that doesn’t happen. People who have had long courtships and have been living together, need it perhaps more than than people who’re going in on for arranged marriages . Why? Because once you’re living in with someone ,you think you know everything that there is to know about that person and marriage cant spring any surprises. But guess what? You WILL be surprised greatly by what surprises pre marital counseling will bring for you. Marriage changes the set of expectations two individuals have from each other. More issues have to be dealt with, like children, financial planning etc. Most couples spend more time planning their weddings than their marriages!. If you think about the amount of financial and emotional investment that goes into preparing for the wedding itself, doesn’t it make sense to invest a little in strengthening the relationship at the onset? Many couples preparing for marriage honestly believe they are strong going into the union – and they probably are in a lot of ways. Being caught up with all the loving feelings and other feel-good stuff going on ahead of nuptials, couples often don’t consider the potential pitfalls. Those â€Å"pitfalls† are often times what leads them into a therapist’s office some time down the line. Here six great reasons to get pre marriage counseling: 1) Strengthen Communication Skills:  Being able to effectively listen, truly hear and validate the other’s position is a skill that isn’t necessarily a â€Å"given† for many people. Couples that really communicate effectively can discuss and resolve issues when they arise more effectively. You can tune up your talking and listening skills. This is one of the most important aspects of emotional safety between couples. 2) Discuss Role Expectations:  It’s incredibly common for married couples to never really have discussed who will be doing what in the marriage. This can apply to job, finances, chores, sexual intimacy and more. Having an open and honest discussion about what each of you expect from the other in a variety of areas leads to fewer surprises and upsets down the line. 3) Learn Conflict Resolution Skills:  Nobody wants to think that they’ll have conflict in their marriage. The reality is that â€Å"conflict† can range from disagreements about who will take out the trash to emotionally charged arguments about serious issues – and this will probably be part of a couple’s story at one time or another. There are ways to effectively de-escalate conflict that are highly effective and can decrease the time spent engaged in the argument. John Gottman’s (www. gottman. com) research has shown that couples who can do this well are less likely to divorce in the end. 4) Explore Spiritual Beliefs:  For some this is not a big issue – but for others a serious one. Differing spiritual beliefs are not a problem as long as it’s been discussed and there is an understanding of how they will function in the marriage with regards to practice, beliefs, children, etc. ) Identify any Problematic Family of Origin Issues:  We learn so much of how to â€Å"be† from our parents, primary caregivers and other early influences. If one of the partners experienced a high conflict or unloving household, it can be helpful to explore that in regards to how it might play out in the marriage. Couples who have an understanding of the existence of any problematic conditioning around how relationships work are usually better at disrupting repetition of these learned behaviors. ) Develop Personal, Couple and Family Goals:  It amazes me how many married couples have never discussed their relationship goals – let alone personal or family. I honestly think it just doesn’t cross their minds! This is a long term investment together – why not put your heads together and look at how you’d like the future to look? Where do you want to be in five years? Approximately when would you like to have children? How many children? There are many areas that can be explored and it can be a fun exercise to do together. Pre marriage counseling doesn’t need to be a long process, especially if you feel you’re starting out with a very solid foundation and only need some clarifications and goal-setting. For some people who are poised to start out the marriage as a â€Å"higher conflict† couple or have deeper issues to contend with, the process could take a bit longer. Regardless, be sure to take the time to invest in your marriage as you might in the event itself. The return on your marriage investment has the potential to be life long What you can expect Premarital counseling typically includes five to seven meetings with a counselor. Often in premarital counseling, each partner is asked to separately answer a written questionnaire, known as a premarital assessment questionnaire. These questionnaires encourage partners to assess their perspectives of one another and their relationship. They can also help identify a couple’s strengths, weaknesses and potential problem areas. The aim is to foster awareness and discussion and encourage couples to address concerns proactively. Your counselor can help you interpret your results together, encourage you and your partner to discuss areas of common unhappiness or disagreement, and set goals to help you overcome challenges. Your counselor might also have you and your partner use a tool called a Couples Resource Map — a picture and scale of your perceived support from individual resources, relationship resources, and cultural and community resources. You and your partner will create separate maps at first. Following a discussion with your counselor about differences between the two maps, you’ll create one map as a couple. The purpose is to help you and your partner remember to use these resources to help manage your problems. In addition, your counselor might ask you and your partner questions to find out your unique visions for your marriage and clarify what you can do to make small, positive changes in your relationship. Keep in mind that you bring your own values, opinions and personal history into a relationship, and they might not always match your partner’s. In addition, many people go into marriage believing it will fulfill their social, financial, sexual and emotional needs — and that’s not always the case. By discussing differences and expectations before marriage, you and your partner can better understand and support each other during marriage. Early intervention is important because the risk of divorce is highest early in marriage. In Pre marital counseling, as couples you become aware of so many issues that you never thought existed earlier between you two. Premarital counseling is a way to pull the darkness out from its hiding places so that you can turn it over in the light and see it for what it actually is. Remember, preparing for marriage involves more than choosing a wedding dress and throwing a party. Take the time to build a solid foundation for your relationship.

Saturday, January 4, 2020

Chinua Achebe s Things Fall Apart And Joseph Conrad s...

Where They Looked There are millions of varying perspectives in the world on many different topics. Sometimes two different mindsets clash and disagree with one another. This is apparent in the work of Chinua Achebe’s Things Fall Apart and Joseph Conrad’s Heart of Darkness. Achebe gives a personal account of African life, culture, and customs in his book. He grew up in Nigeria, solidifying the reality that his take on their culture is the most natural, the one that will hit home. Also, since Achebe grew up surrounded by the culture so it is something intimately familiar to him. On the other hand, Joseph Conrad’s book Heart of Darkness makes Africa into a wild and savage place that needs to be ‘tamed’ by the white men and their ways.†¦show more content†¦Achebe includes many literary devices like personifications, hyperboles, and imagery. He writes with liveness reminiscing the old times as â€Å"the sun rose slowly to the center of the sky, and the dry, sandy footway began to throw up the heat that lay buried in it†(Achebe). He creates this tone in his writing by describing his experiences, like sudden flashbacks. This causes the readers sympathetic and more open to looking through the African native perspective. This conveys a message to foreigners that there is more to Africa than land and natural resources. It has divine culture and ancient civilizations. Joseph Conrad, on the other hand, writes his excerpt with prodigious detail, unique tone, and creative alliteration. Conrad has a surprised, and foreign tone when he portrays parts of Africa. He presents his mindset of Africa as if he were a child entering the alien territory, innocent with mixed emotions of fear, nervousness, and tension. The mood in the excerpt is gloomy and forlorn, as he says there was, â€Å"no joy in the brilliance of sunshine...amongst the overwhelming realities of this strange world of plants, and water, and silence,† (Conra d, 102). Most people view the sun as a positive object, but Conrad contradicts that and pictures it in a negative way. Conrad also uses alliteration to emphasize his thoughts, feelings, and emotions about Africa, â€Å" silvery sandboxes... inscrutable intention.. whether it meant